Funny Christmas Quotes and Thankyou

A lovely Christmas Carol from far away.
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Thankyou everyone who has read Submarine Matters during 2018. And thankyou all who have commented. In 2019 I aim to move to Adelaide, South Australia, where most of Australia's naval ship and submarine building is to happen.

The social situations of Christmas are often funny. Here's a list of what some might have quipped in the past.

“Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.”– Victor Borge

After a good Christmas dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relatives. - Oscar Wilde

So we put up the National Christmas Tree to celebrate the birth of Jesus. But we won't take it down. It can stay up to celebrate MY Birthday in June. – Donald Trump

“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mum took me to see Santa in a department store. Then Santa asked me for my autograph.”– Shirley Temple

“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. The birth of Santa?”– Matt Groening

“There ain’t no Sanity Clause” – Chico Marx

“I bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note saying, toys not included.” 

- Bernard Manning

"Christmas is a time when you get homesick, even when you’re home." - Carol Nelson

Wretched, guilty, excess is an unfortunate human trait that turns what should be a quiet, peaceful, Christmas season into a crazy frenzy of shopping. – Radar O'Reilly

Christmas Shopping: I think its wonderful to buy all my friends a gift that doesn't need dusting, but is practical and personal. So I bought all my friends Gift Certificates for flu shots.

 – Dagwood Bumstead

“What kind of Christmas present would Jesus ask Santa for?” - Salman Rushdie

 “There are some people who want to throw their arms round you simply because its Christmas; there are other people who want to strangle you simply because it is Christmas.”– Robert Lynd

"At Christmas, Santa's presents are compulsory. Relatives are optional.” ― Santa

Wishing everyone all the best over Christmas and in 2019.

Pete